PARENT RAGE

Had a very peculiar experience today whilst shopping with husband and the three youngest offspring.

Now shopping "en famile" is fraught with its own dangers - husband isn't known for his tolerance when I am umming and ahhhhing about what to buy and the boys are definitely following in his footsteps in that regard. However, we had carefully negotiated our itinerary and objectives and had spent a couple of very productive hours re-shoeing the boys and getting a dress for me to wear for these blessed Awards on Friday. All good stuff.

So as a reward, husband was to be treated to a fresh, warm pasty from a well known high street retailer.......... As I was pushing the buggy, I brought up the rear whilst husband went ahead and ordered....... I looked up to see number 4 son picking himself up off the tiled floor in some obvious distress. It was a pretty unpleasant autumn day - very damp and he simply slipped on the tiles. What I was completely unprepared for was the sight of a grown man sitting at a nearby table laughing at my poor boy's distress. Maternal instinct prevailed and I gave my boy a cuddle and rubbed him better. He was ok - bit shaken up but no major injuries.

I glanced again at the table where the "offender" was still chuckling away. I just couldn't believe it and not in some comic Victor Meldrew way either.

What a PIG.

I stood and stared and I think he realised I wasn't overly impressed with his behaviour. I didn't say anything though goodness I had some choice phrases running through my mind. So to the gentleman in the Traditional Pasty Shop in Norwich City Centre at about 1pm today I would offer the following. "May your ear holes turn to arseholes and shit upon your shoulders".

Sorry to be so crude and base to those of a sensitive disposition but this person had obviously had an empathy bypass and subtlety would be lost.

Rant over. It was a lovely day other than that!

90 Plus Things You Never Knew About Me (and didn't really want to!!)

Found this over at Self Employed Mum - made me giggle so thought I'd give it a go...

1. How old will you be in five years? 47 - have no idea how THAT happened.....
2. Who did you spend at least two hours with today? The tribe, husband and James, my manager.
3. How tall are you? 5’7 - not tall enough!
4. What do you look forward to most in the next six weeks? Any day with the brood is a good one.
5. What's the last movie you saw? Can't remember at the minute
6. Who was the last person you called? Home to see how my baby is doing - she has an ear infection.
7. Who was the last person to call you? My friend Jo trying to find me at lunch time.
8. What was the last text message you received? Boring - work related
9. Who was the last person to leave you a voicemail? Again can't remember
10. Do you prefer to call or text? Call - I always forget something if I text
11. What were you doing at 12am last night? Nursing my baby, Evie.=
12. Are your parents married/separated/divorced? Divorced years ago - both really happily remarried for over 20 years.
13. When is the last time you saw your mom? Last night - took her some mending. Thanks Mum!
14. What color are your eyes? Never been able to work this one out. Greenish
15. What time did you wake up today? 7 but ignored the alarm
16. What are you wearing right now? Looking hot in my pj bottoms and gap fleece. Ensemble is completed by my to die for sheepskin mewels - the most comfortable footwear there is.
17. What is your favorite Christmas song? A tie between Away in a Manger and Silent Night - or would they be classed as carols? For cheese value it has to be Wham "Last Christmas"
18. Where is your favorite place to be? Anywhere with my family
19. Where is your least favourite place to be? God how amenable am I - can't think of anywhere!
20. Where would you go if you could go anywhere? Undecided between Hawaii and Oz
21. Where do you think you'll be in 10 years? Still living in the same town, hopefully still as happily married with some strapping sons and an adolescent daughter - deep joy!
22. Do you tan or burn? Tan so long as I don't go silly
23. What did you fear was going to get you at night as a child?A monster from Dr Who
24. What was the last thing that REALLY made you laugh? Mass bundle with the tribe and husband - always has us in fits.
25. How many TVs do you have in your house? Three - I got really strict a couple of years ago and took them out of the kids bedrooms.
26. How big is your bed? King size - we need the space for cuddles
27. Do you have a laptop or desktop computer? Desktop - brand spankin new Dell - cheers hubby
28. Do you sleep with or without clothes on? Really depends - prefer nothing but do wear pj's if its really chilly
29. What color are your sheets? Lilac
30. How many pillows do you sleep with? 3 - 1 to cuddle, the others for my head
31. What is your favorite season? Unquestionably summer
32. What do you like about fall? Bugger all - it means winter is on the way and the cricket season is over.
33. What do you like about winter? Again bugger all - its cold and dark.
34. What do you like about the summer? Everything - long evenings, spending hours at the cricket club
35. What do you like about spring? It means the summer is on its way. Not wearing layers of cashmere - do you get the idea I don't do cold!
36. How many states/provinces have you lived in? Um, gets fingers out - 4
37. What cities/towns have you lived in? Norfolk, Northern Ireland, Manchester, London
38. Do you prefer shoes, socks, or bare feet? Bare feet everytime - bit of an aging hippy at heart.
39. Are you a social person? Definitely - couldn't keep me in when I was a kid.
40. What was the last thing you ate? Orange lolly
41. What is your favorite restaurant? Morston Hall
42. What is your favorite ice cream? Good quality vanilla
43. What is your favorite dessert?
44. What is your favorite kind of soup? Lentil
45. What kind of jelly do you like on your PB & J sandwich? Not American! Don't do PB & J sandwiches. Do like Marmite though!
46. Do you like Chinese food? Yes
47. Do you like coffee? Yuk no - I am a tea girl everytime
48. How many glasses of water a day? Depends - from 0 to 6/8
49. What do you drink in the morning? Tea - decaff though
50. Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed? Right - we even work it out when we go away!
51. Do you know how to play poker? Not a clue!
52. Do you like to cuddle? Absolutely
53. Have you ever been to Canada? Never - got family there though so I should
54. Do you have an addictive personality? Yes - reformed smoker..... can manifest itself in some mad ways
55. Do you eat out or at home more often? Home - not enough disposable income to do otherwise
56. Do you know anyone with the same birthday as you? No - close but not the same day
57. Do you want kids? Bit late for that one - I've got 5!
58. Do you speak any other languages? Schoolgirl French
59. Have you ever gotten stitches? Only in my lady bits when I had number 1 son
60. Have you ever ridden in an ambulance? Yep - husband got rushed to A&E in 2005. It wass blues & twos all the way and I was really car sick when we got there. He made a full recovery though!
61. Do you prefer an ocean or a pool? Pool - too many poo's in the sea around here!
62. Do you prefer a window seat or an aisle seats? Window - fascinates me
63. Do you know how to drive stick? Is this a leading question?? Yes I can drive stick.
64. What is your favorite thing to spend money on? Pink dresses
65. Do you wear any jewelry 24/7? Wedding ring, Tiffany bracelet, watch, 3 ear-rings
66. What is your favorite TV show? ER - Goran Visnic is just lush
67. Can you roll your tongue? Think so.............
68. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? No - I'm over 40 not 4
69. What is the main ring tone on your phone? Crazy - Gnarls Berkley
70. Do you still have clothes from when you were little? Just one dress I couldn't bear to part with.
71. What red object is closest to you right now? A predominantly red picture by Evie
72. Do you turn off the water while you brush your teeth? Sometimes
73. Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed? No doors on them
74. Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of bees? Bees I guess - less chance of it being fatal I suppose. Can't I just hide until they've all gone away?
75. What do you dip a chicken nugget in? Yuk - been veggie all my life
76. What is your favorite food? Depends. If all else fails give me a bag of Quavers
77. Can you change the oil on a car? Not a chance!
78. Have you ever gotten a speeding ticket? No - husband got 2 in a week - boy did I give him a hard time!
79. Have you ever run out of gas? Diesel once - nightmare
80. What is your usual bedtime? 10.30pm
81. What was the last book you read? Some lightweight chick lit
82. Do you read the newspaper? the local one
83. Do you have any magazine subscriptions? Yes - In Style - god how shallow am I
84. Do you watch soap operas? Yes Eastenders
85. Do you dance in the car? Absolutely - and sing really loudly. My children love it - not!
86. What radio station did you last listen to? Radio 1
87. Who is in the picture frame closest to you? The tribe of course.
88. What was the last note you scribbled on a piece of paper? To do lists at work
89. What is your favorite candle scent? Don't tend to burn candles - don't trust my kids around them
90. What is your favorite board game? Cannot for the life of me remember the last time I played a board game.
91. Who was your favorite teacher in high school? Mrs Drury - History. Great teacher and totally straight.
92. What is the longest you have ever camped out in a tent? Have never camped as an adult - nowhere to plug my hairdryer in!

The Article

http://groups.google.co.uk/group/manic-mothers-tribe/files?hl=en&upload=1

This link should, I hope, take you to the article in today's EDP.........

Me!

Want to get a photo on here of me and apparently I have to get a URL first so here goes!!!

And I didn't Feel a Thing

Been tagged by Self Employed Mum at http://selfemployedmum.blogspot.com/ to do a MEME, which apparently has to be about why I blog.

In all truthfulness, I had been reading a friend of a friend's blog for a couple of months and, after a particularly "challenging" week, decided to vent some of my frustrations on the computer....... And Manic Mother of Five was born.

Have thoroughly enjoyed putting some thoughts "out there"........ Met some really interesting people too.

Also quite liked the anonymity too but that is going to be blown out of the water this week when my first article is published in our local newspaper. Sorry, how funny does that sound - am chuckling as I type that.......

Am generally a very happy, upbeat person but do find being able to moan to an unknown audience very cathartic.......

I now tag "swearing mother" to tell us all.....................

"Be careful what you dream of it may come up and surprise you"

Lyrics from an Icicle Works song. I dreamed for years and years of having a daughter, finally got one and what a minx she is! Got the tribe all scrubbed and gorgeous ready for a photo session at Evie's nursery. Got there, the boys all assumed their various poses as instructed by the photographer...... Daughter refused point blank to leave my side - indeed clung to me like a baby monkey. Consequently I will be sending a christmas picture out this year with my ugly mug right in the middle of my babes. Great! Got home in a definite snot and decided to snap a few at home. Managed to persuade Evie to give her brother a cuddle and snapped away. Am pleasantly pleased with this one. You can tell by the expression that she wasn't in the mood for posing. Bloody women!

SEPTEMBER

Well September has been and gone, taking with it the last games of cricket and my birthday....... Its usually an industrious month in our house. As I have husband and older sons about, lots of jobs that have been neglected over the summer finally get done. We have started to clear out the loft (I was getting seriously worried that the ceilings may come down!) and had a change about of bedrooms for the boys.

Everybody seems to have got back into the swing of school or college and I have resigned myself to flying around like some possessed harpy in the morning rather than the leisurely preparations of the summer when I only had to get me and the daughter out of the door.

Number one son is getting enjoying learning to drive, though admits he doesn't find it easy -much to my relief. I didn't want him to be over-confident and breeze through learning........ Two 19 year old lads from ourtown have recently died in a car crash, which was a very sobering experience........

The football season is upon us and husband has decided to come out of retirement - yet again. I watch occasionally but its no good, its not the same as sitting watching a game of cricket on a hot summer's day with something cool in hand............

Was lucky enough to be invited to see Erasure - on the guest list no less. Felt v glam waltzing past the hoi polloi. It was at out local venue and my goodness the put on a real "show". Have seen loads of bands over the years but for shear entertainment, they certainly are up there with the best. Cheers Mark!

Birthday came and went, 42 isn't exactly v inspiring is it. Had lunch with a couple of lovely ladies, which was a real pleasure. Number one son bought me a Flake and a glossy magazine - that boy so knows his mother.............

Have been nominated for a work-related award and had the interview the day after my birthday................ Think it went ok but will find out on November 2nd. Keep your fingers crossed - I am embarrassingly keen to win!! Yet more evidence that I need to get out more!

The last day of the month I had promised our collective services to my mum and dad to help with the pruning....... It was a glorious day and we all set to with mum acting as foreman. It was so enjoyable just being outside with my kids and doing something productive. Our reward was a roast lunch with chicken for the boys and every conceivable vegetable for their non-meat eating mum. Just goes to show that the simple things in life can be so good for you.

OK, that's September. Will update you as to October's goings on soon. I promise and sorry for being so neglectful.